Some Halloween Candles I Found, Once

This happened three years ago.
And it's all true.


Here is a house in New Jersey.
That morning, my friends saw a post on their local neighborhood blog that this very house would be giving away their Halloween decorations.


It's always weird pulling up to a stranger's house and seeing the bins of free stuff outside. Do I just walk up and start rummaging? Are the people I'm mooching off of IN the house? Are they looking at me, through their curtains and wondering what - from their LITERAL PILE OF GARBAGE - I'm going to take home with me? Or are they out apple picking?


This bin was garbage.


I was pretty sure that this bin was full of basement- or attic-spiders...


...but that Ziploc bag caught my eye, as any chock-full Ziploc bag SHOULD!


Jackpot.

Candle jackpot.


CONTENTS INCLUDED:


Proud Homeowner Ghost

Each one of these candles is made of that ultra-light type of wax. The kind never meant to actually be burned. The kind that if you tried to burn it, it'd melt in the span of 30 seconds, lighting your house on fire it in the next 30 seconds.



Cap'n Skelet'n

Not every candle in this bag was a "winner". In fact, I don't think this one even made it all the way home with me. Did I leave it at my friend's house, as a constant reminder of the time I made them drive us to a stranger's house to look through old Halloween junk?
I'm a bad guest.


I'm not sure that's how a lobster skeleton would look. In fact... (flips through old biology textbook)... huh, well I stand corrected! Biologically accurate in every way. Tell your friends.


WICK-ed Witch (GET IT?!?!?)

Neither cute nor horrifying, this witch can only be described as "pendulous".


The things this cat must have seen, to be so scared it's crying.


Pumpkin votives!

They're a little too "smiley face" "have a nice day" for me, but they get a "P" for effort.
(PS - P-ing should not require an effort. Consult your doctor.)


I know you all wanna see what that pumpkin's butt looks like, so there's the verso detail, you pervs!



Here we go! Here we go! Here we go!
Finally, something worth the time you put into reading this stupid post!
A Trilogy of Terror, in candle form! Rest In Paraffin.
A+ Would decorate for Halloween with, again.


And the piece of resistance (sic): Ghost votives! Ghostives!
Look carefully, chums, there are FIVE different ghosts! Whoever originally made these spent that extra little bit sculpting and designing FIVE unique spirits, when they could have done one and knocked off early for the night.

Yeah, I guess I could have leveraged this same praise towards the pumpkin votives, above... but eff 'em. I like these ghosts, better.

More praise for ghosts!

A Double++! Definitely would decorate for Halloween with again!


Also in one of the on-lawn boxes was this child-size BOO! bracelet that I think accessorizes well with my wrist-hair. (Yes, taking it off hurt very much, as it pulled most of that out... but I suffer for my art. I suffer for you.)

And there you have it. Candles.
Street candles I found in 2014

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